Door To December
by Rizember
Summary: Sequel to An Unlikely Romance. "You placed a marriage jutsu," Sasuke deadpanned, staring at a grinning Tsunade. "On me and the idiot?" Naruto didn't say anything. He just jumped out the window in a random suicide attempt. Sasunaru
1. Chapter 1

** Door to December**

By Rizember

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**Summary**: Sequel to An Unlikely Romance. Set 3 years later. "Marriage jutsu." Sasuke deadpanned, staring at a grinning Tsunade. "You placed a _marriage jutsu_ on me and the idiot?" Naruto didn't say anything. He had just jumped out the window in a random suicide attempt. SasuNaruSasu, yaoi

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**For mu149**

**Who believed in me (no matter how misplaced that belief)**

**and **

**For Lunarious1000**

**who doesn't believe I'm from the future**

**x-x**

**This fic will make no sense at all without reading An Unlikely Romance. Just letting you know. **

**But I suppose you could try anyway, if you're determined.**

**x-x**

**Disclaimer: Yadee yadaa, I own nadaa…**

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**Chapter 1: Reunion**

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**Name**: Tsunade

**Age**: Classified. Probably wouldn't be true even if we had one.

**Class**: Hokage-level

**Purpose in Life:** To get lucky and gamble herself to wealth.

**Current State of Said Purpose in Life**: *insert snort here*

"SHIZUNE! Shizune, get in here! I did it!"

In the hallway, a brunette ran past several people, rushing in excitement into the large oval room. Shizune stuck her head in, failing to hide her excitement.

"Tsunade?"

Tsunade was grinning at her, looking triumphant. "I did it."

"You finished the jutsu?" Shizune grinned back, squealing along with the pig in her hands.

Tsunade snorted. "Even better!" She held up a large cup with a frothy, steamy drink. "I made the _perfect_ latte."

The silence that followed that declaration was equivalent to the silence after the dreaded, 'I'm pregnant'…hell, it could give _that_ silence a run for its money.

"I can't believe you," Shizune hissed, turning away.

"Wait-"

Shizune looked over her shoulder and gave Tsunade a potent glare. "It's been three years. At this rate, it'll be too late to do anything."

With that, the brunette and the pig haughtily left, dignity rolling off them in waves… If Tsunade wasn't going to take this seriously then there was no hope left.

Back in the large room, Tsunade paced, stopping occasionally only to nod at herself, frown and then begin pacing again. She hated upsetting Shizune but honestly, the woman could have at least _tasted_ the latte.

The oval room was large and clean, completely neat in its utter lack of paperwork to be seen anywhere. Books lined the many book cases, shelves and boxes that were all lined up and she occasionally threw them wary glances, as if they would attempt to assassinate her with information.

It was nothing like the Hokage office she'd had.

And she felt oddly about that. Bitterness and relief flooded her along with a sense of regret but then she smiled slowly. Tsunade walked to the large desk and sat in the comfortable chair behind it. Swinging leisurely, she opened a drawer and took out a small scroll and unrolled it onto her desk.

Brown eyes scanned the many words, elements and symbols before she sighed and leaned back against the chair. Redemption was a hell of a lot more work than being Hokage had ever been.

Her thoughts turned to Konoha and she frowned unconsciously.

She hadn't been Hokage in three years, having been exiled herself, and Shizune right beside her.

Danzou had taken advantage of Naruto's exile. He'd blamed Tsunade and the people, like the sad little sheep they were, had agreed with him. The council members had taken Danzou's side and Tsunade was unceremoniously impeached- just a week after Naruto's exile. And what a bloody week that was.

It was like Naruto had been the seam that held the village together and everything just fell apart afterwards.

Several of the ninjas and villagers still loyal to the blond had left as well, all before Danzou was instated as the sixth Hokage and Tsunade was exiled.

Sasuke left first.

That hadn't come as much of a surprise. What _did_ surprise them was that he wasn't following Naruto. He wasn't claiming he'd bring him back like many assumed he would. In fact, Sasuke had seemed thoroughly pissed off and Tsunade was sure she'd heard him promising to kill Naruto but she figured she'd heard wrong. Those two _loved_ each other. It wasn't rocket science.

Hell, even the blind hobo who lived in a box at the corner near the Hokage tower knew that.

But something had happened the night before Naruto left. Something Sasuke told no one.

The only thing people knew for sure was that Naruto left and Sasuke was sending evil vibes across the village. He resigned from ANBU and left the village without a word to anyone.

The next to leave, shockingly, was Sakura.

Tsunade had been both impressed and worried. She had no idea whether her apprentice was following Sasuke or Naruto. And if she was following them both, what did she think she would achieve? Naruto and Sasuke were both S-class nins in their own rights. If Sakura engaged them in battle, no amount of hulk-like 'me smash you' power was going to save her ass.

But Tsunade had to admire her stubbornness anyway.

Sakura had left the day after Sasuke. Which had led many to believe it was either a fan girl rescue mission or a fan girl 'take me with you' type of deal.

Tsunade would have preferred it to be the former. The latter was a tad bit embarrassing.

But she had reasons to believe that it was neither.

Tsunade had a hunch that Sakura had actually left for her own reasons and had gone after neither of the two. She'd become a responsible kunoichi and if she had done the foolish deed of stalking either of those fools, Tsunade would see to it that Sakura got an imperial ass-whooping and a day-long lecture about fangirling.

After Sakura, the last ninja to leave the village, was Hinata.

No one knew her reasons.

Maybe her old love for Naruto had returned and she had gone in search of declaring it. Maybe she had decided to attack Sasuke while he was out and alone. Maybe she was on holiday.

Hinata leaving had been one big mystery. Especially seeing as her sister, Hanabi, had immediately been named the next heir and Neji had been proclaimed the current leader, as Hiashi had stepped down.

No one understood Hyuuga politics but there were theories. Stupid theories. Mostly involving Hinata leaving to have wild, forest sex with both boys and maybe asking Sakura to join in… stupid, _stupid_ theories.

Tsunade was sure half those perverted rumours had been started by Jiraiya.

Shaking her head, she picked up a bell that had been sitting on her desk and rang it loudly.

"Tsunade?"

Tsunade looked up from her desk and nodded at the people at the door.

They were deep in the forests of the Fire Country. Which was amazing in and of itself because no one had bothered trying to assassinate them. But then, it wasn't like anyone could find their lair and live long enough to even realize what it was...

Tsunade stretched and waited while the three people entered the room.

Following Danzou's takeover, many ninja had secretly declared their loyalty to Tsunade and had stayed loyal all these years, spying for her and sending her information.

Three of them were in her 'office' right now, awaiting her orders.

Kakashi, Jiraiya and Shizune all stared at her. Shizune was glaring at her, Jiraiya was staring at her breasts- apparently they would converse with him- and Kakashi was reading his little book o' porn.

How any of them had become ninjas was beyond her. Well, at least Shizune had the 'death aura, killer intent' down pat. The other two were just two perverts.

It was a shame, really.

"You rang for us?" Shizune prompted coldly.

Tsunade refrained from rolling her eyes, simply deciding to get on with it.

She looked down at the scroll and smiled. "I've finished the scroll."

Shizune scoffed.

"I really have."

"And?"

"And it'll be sure to get not only Naruto and Sasuke back, but Hinata and Sakura as well."

"What then?" Jiraiya asked her boobs.

"_Then_," Tsunade said, throwing a chair at him and receiving a satisfying smack, crack and yell. "We take Konoha back."

"Anarchy," a voice said from the window. "I like it."

"Itachi, we have doors," Tsunade sighed, nodding at him in acknowledgement.

The Uchiha gave her a dry look. "That wouldn't be very ninja-ly."

"That's not a word."

"Uchihas are not limited by vocabulary."

Tsunade stopped from smacking him with a dictionary and sat on her desk, eyeing him warily when he stood by Kakashi and started to peek over his shoulder, reading along.

If their plan worked, it would be a miracle.

"Even if we get them all back, there's no guarantee they'll help us take Konoha back," Shizune said quietly.

Tsunade chuckled. "Well, Naruto swore his loyalty to me before he left actually. I saw him last. And he asked me to take care of the Littlest Uchiha. Like I'm a babysitting service."

"Sasuke left," Itachi commented, motioning for Kakashi to turn the page.

"Yes," Tsunade rolled her eyes. "Thank you. I hadn't realized." She looked out the window. "Sasuke, being who he is, was apparently offended by Naruto the night he left and-"

"Ten bucks says Naruto shagged him and ran," Jiraiya piped up.

"You're on," Itachi smirked. "I say Sasuke shagged _him_ and _then_ Naruto ran."

"Getting back on topic!" Tsunade growled and they hushed up. "WE get them back and Naruto _will_ help me. Sasuke will help so he can get vengeance on Naruto for whatever it was that happened between them-"

"You'd think he'd realize the revenge angle is getting old," Kakashi commented airily.

Tsunade gave up. She started to study the scroll while Shizune smacked Kakashi upside his head and yelled at the three men.

"How do we get Sakura and Hinata?" Shizune asked when she was done.

Tsunade smiled. "You get Sakura. I'll get Hinata."

"How? We don't even know where they are."

"Simple loyalty jutsu."

"So…" Shizune grinned. "They'll be drawn to us?"

Tsunade nodded.

"But the only way to break a loyalty jutsu is to do a favour for the bonder. Either that or kill the bond partner, kill the one who made the bond or kill yourself."

"Yes well," Tsunade coughed. "Before the killing, me and you need to bail so they get straight to the part where their only option is doing us the damn favour."

"Getting us Konoha?"

"Yep. They'll be free once we have it."

"Isn't that like slavery?" Jiraiya asked, curious.

"Why yes, yes it is."

"Nice."

Tsunade rolled her eyes.

"Okay, what jutsu for the boys?"

Tsunade grinned and took a pen, writing a few more words onto the scroll and stepping back satisfied.

"Shizune, hold my latte."

Tsunade bit her thumb and pressed it onto the scroll in a line before pressing her other hand flat onto the scroll.

She shut her eyes, mumbling the necessary incantation and keeping a steady chakra flow out of her hand.

She felt a flare of chakra as the scroll tried to absorb to much at once but she quelled it.

This was about control.

"She looks hot like that…"

Maybe having perverts in the same room while she was doing this delicate procedure wasn't a good idea.

Tsunade kept her eyes closed, feeling power creep up her hand, coiling around her arm as it did.

Her body glowed green and the four other people stopped talking and all stared at her.

Her hair was raised with the pure power coming from the jutsu and she frowned slightly. Her mind seemed to be searching the countries, going quickly over lands and rivers, drawn towards something.

Suddenly, the glow stopped and Tsunade stepped back. Her eyes were still closed and her body was on fire. She figured she could handle the small pain for now.

Opening her eyes, she found the others staring at her arm.

She looked down at it and smiled.

Four tattooed marks, like bracelets, were engraved in her skin. Black, blue, red and purple.

Jiraiya was glaring. "You just did two separate jutsu simultaneously."

Tsunade nodded.

"Do you realize how dangerous that is! You could have _died_ if a single thing went wrong! We were _talking_! What if you lost concentration or-"

Tsunade smiled warmly at him and he immediately shut up, blushing lightly and clearing his throat.

"The red and purple are for Sakura and Hinata. They'll have the same marks on them. The black and blue are for Naruto and Sasuke. Kakashi, get Sasuke. Jiraiya, you'll go get Naruto. They'll both be really…_desperate_…to get here."

Jiraiya blinked and smirked. "You added summoning jutsus to it?"

Tsunade chuckled. "Of course. They'll get here faster that way."

"But their human," Shizune pointed out.

"So just imagine how much discomfort they'll feel if they don't come to me," Tsunade pointed out smugly.

"She's trying to get us all killed," Shizune muttered, walking out the door to go prepare.

Tsunade chuckled as they all left.

She was left staring at the scroll, and looking at all the modifications she'd made.

It was a summons scroll, adjusted to call the four. Since they weren't animals or summons by any means, they'd just feel slight itching to get to Tsunade- without knowing why they were being led there or by whom. Also, the itchy feeling would grow to full blown irritation and desperation to get to her. That would make the search for them relatively easy.

The other modifications were complicated, especially the bonding one that would ensure that Sakura and Hinata were forced to help- or die. It was drastic but these were drastic times. Besides, Tsunade was sure they would both be eager to help. The boys however…

Naruto and Sasuke…

Tsunade grinned as she stared at their section of the scroll.

The jutsu she'd used on them was different from the loyalty jutsu. Theirs was special.

and they'd be racing to get to Tsunade to have her remove it. Especially seeing as the effects would get worse with time.

Tsunade smiled.

It served them right.

They'd both given her grief for far too long. This was payback.

**(I am a perverted page break. I stole your underwear...and I'm wearing it)**

**Name**: Naruto Uzumaki

**Age:** 21

**Class**: S-class missing nin, former Konoha genin

**Purpose in Life:** Unknown.

**Current state of Said Purpose in Life**: Unknown. Secretive bugger.

The blond man leaned against the tree trunk, eyes closed and looking every bit the wary and foolish traveler.

He was there almost a full ten minutes before he heard groaning, panting and huffing.

A man with short, spiky dark hair was coming up the forest path. He had a cane in his hand and there were several streaks of gray in his hair. His old, tattered peasant clothes were worn out and he looked like he could use a bath.

He trudged slowly up the path and stopped in front of Naruto, peering at him before prodding him in the chest with his stick.

Naruto growled, grabbing the stick and snapping it in two like a twig.

"You're late."

The man snorted and straightened out, stretching. "Hey, unlike _you_, when a woman offers her body shamelessly to me, gosh darn it, I'm taking the offer."

Naruto rolled his eyes and started to walk in the direction opposite the one the man had just come from. The man's genjutsu was well enough to travel with. The expensive clothes and 'I shower three times a day' look weren't exactly travel friendly. Naruto didn't have to worry about his own looks. No one ever bothered people in cloaks and they usually assumed they were either dirt poor or deadly.

"The redhead was _amazing!_ Oh, you should have seen the way she could twist her-"

"I don't want to hear about your prostitute indulgence, Shin," Naruto said briskly, his black cloak billowing behind him. He pulled his hood up and walked faster. "We were supposed to reach the village by sun down but because you cant keep your pencil in your pants, we'll have to travel at night."

Shin gasped indignantly. "_Pencil_?"

Naruto smirked and kept walking.

A moment later, he heard a soft rustle. He paused while Shin bent over, complaining about his back and old age.

Naruto leaned closer to Shin, almost like he was asking whether he needed a hand and whispered, "How many?"

"Four and a half."

Naruto glared. "_Half_?"

"Well," Shin shrugged minutely. "Either they have a midget with them, or they kidnapped a child."

Naruto froze at that, straightening out a moment later when a large man stepped out from the forest's shadows.

Naruto nearly snorted.

The man was huge and muscled, he smiled grimly at Naruto and licked his lips. The blond had to keep from blowing chunks at the gesture.

"What do we have here?"

Naruto ignored him while Shin went into a monologue about the old days when backs were stronger and life was hard.

He concentrated and tried to feel for the rest of the chakra signals.

He noticed the four and sighed.

His chakra control had been greatly improved in the last three years, especially under Shin's training. The problem was he couldn't concentrate enough to dispel a layered genjutsu _and_ note all the chakra signals there.

Dammit, he was brilliant, sexy and awesome. There was no way he'd lose to these pompous fools. Word had obviously gotten out that he had issues with layered genjutsus.

When he found out whoever it was who was spreading the rumours, he'd have them declare his absolute _Amazingness_ and _then_ kill them. Maybe he could even get them to leave a note saying how it was suicide from over-exposure to Naruto's brilliance.

Shaking his head slightly, Naruto scowled. How the hell was he supposed to be an elite and _serious_ ninja if those stupid moments of Kit kept popping up.

For the nth time, _that day_, he cursed Danzou again for ruining his life in every possible way.

"When you're done having your flashback, maybe we should get on with this," Shin sighed, edging away from the giant of a man.

Naruto scowled at him. "I wasn't-"

"Please," Shin snorted. "You have like, three every hour. I swear sometimes I can even hear background music. You might want to-"

Naruto took a leisurely step forward, vanishing for a moment in a soft yellow light before reappearing a few feet away from the giant with Shin in his arms.

In the spot where Shin as standing, several kunai littered the ground. Shin paled, turning to thank Naruto when the blond abruptly dropped him onto the dirty forest path.

Shin swore loudly at him.

"Get the kid," Naruto ordered, turning to face the big man. The man in the trees wasn't a problem. His method of staying hidden and attacking was cowardly and all-too-common. Naruto could feel the other two. They had surrounded him.

Naruto smiled.

"What's so funny?" the burly man asked gruffly, pulling a sword out from its sheath.

"Just wondering why you're attacking two poor, unarmed travelers."

"For the bounty, of course," the man replied, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Naruto sighed. _Great._

So they probably knew who he was. Guess the cloak thing wasn't working anyway. He lowered his hood and took on a lazy stance.

The man looked properly offended and charged without a moment's thought. Before he could reach Naruto however, something fell to the ground between them.

The man paused, looking down. His eyes widened and he paled in swift anger.

The body of one of his team mate was between them. Dead.

"D-Dan!" he turned to Naruto. "_You_! I'll kill you!"

Naruto rolled his eyes and when the man blinked, Naruto suddenly had his sword in his hand.

He took an uneasy step back and fell to the ground.

Naruto was inspecting the sword with a bored air. "You know, I really don't enjoy killing."

The man didn't speak.

Two more bodies were thrown in from the forest from two different directions.

"H-how?"

Shin stepped out of the forest looking annoyed. There was a child in his arms, limp. Naruto's breath hitched.

"The kid-"

"he's alright," Shin interrupted. "Just scared."

"You scared him?"

"Me?" Shin snorted. "I'm gorgeous. Maybe he fainted from-"

"Are you going to kill him or can I do it?" an impatient voice asked. It was rich and deep, with an arrogant drawl.

Naruto turned and sighed, facing his partner.

A large black fox with six tails was watching him, its dark brown eyes bored with the whole situation. Blood matted its dark fur and Naruto was assured that Shin actually _hadn't_ attacked anyone.

Naruto shrugged, tossing the sword into the forest. "Sure Kyuubi, knock yourself out."

He and Shin walked down the path, seemingly oblivious to the cries of the man as Kyuubi attacked him. Naruto took the child from Shin. "Where do you think he's from?"

"Hidden village in the Grass," Shin answered easily.

"Good," Naruto stated. "No need for a detour then."

Shin carried the kid without complaint. Naruto was iffy with children. They always seemed to love him but usually after indulging them for a few minutes, he'd suddenly get wary and want to escape, like they'd threatened him.

And Kyuubi would refuse point blank to carry the child if asked. He didn't like children. Apparently they tasted horrible or something.

Shin rolled his eyes, wondering how life had become what it was.

He, Naruto and the arrogant bastard of a fox had been travelling together for nearly three years.

Shin had met Naruto while he was on a trip to Konoha. Shin had been trained as a ninja even though he was nobility. He was to have been the next head of his clan but he'd opted out, claiming he wanted to see the world. Money was no object to getting whatever he wanted and he had no need for security, having been an elite jounin. But all that had bored him.

He started travelling through the forests in the water country, bored and purposefully looking for trouble. Fighting had provided interest for his boredom at least for a few minutes. But then, one day, he'd killed a man with a bounty on his head.

Curious, Shin had gone to the hidden village of mist, Kirigakure, and had claimed the bounty. He'd gotten the money without question but he hadn't needed it. He carried the large sack of money with him, moving through the forest and sinking into boredom.

No one could fight on par with him. At least the dead guy had put up something of a fight though. Which was when he'd realized that maybe he could take down the people in the bingo book- not the notoriously deadly ones of course, that would be suicide and he was _bored_ with life, not tired of it.

That day, he met Naruto.

The boy had been asleep in a clearing on a dry patch of ground. He'd seemed so pathetic and weak, all alone in the forest just waiting for the next thug to stumble upon him and murder his stupid ass.

Feeling a tug of pity, Shin had taken off his cloak and put it over the boy before leaving his sack of money and walking away.

**(I am a Start-of-Flashback Page break. I'm old and weary. Why, in **_**my**_** day…)**

"You didn't try to kill him."

Shin had jumped sky high, ninja training be damned.

In front of him was a giant of a fox, black and ominous, staring at him. The fox was _huge_ even by ninja standards and had six tails. It was sitting on its hind legs, staring him in the eye, taller than him by at least an inch.

"Er…" he answered intelligently.

"Blondie over there. You didn't try to kill him. Why?" the fox said clearly.

_Talking fox_, Shin thought, wondering how to react. _I could be really awed, severely creeped out…or I could run._

In his mind, voting was going rapidly toward running when the fox grinned. That made the vote unanimous.

"I have no reason to kill him," he answered after a moment.

The fox snorted. "I didn't ask why you didn't kill him. I asked why you didn't _try_. I would have ripped your throat out if you'd even _thought_ about harming him," it said calmly, as if talking about the weather and not ripping out his jugular.

"Right, well. I had no reason to try."

"Why did you leave your bounty money with him?"

Shin as getting irritated. He'd done a good deed. What the hell was with all the questions?

"I don't know."

"Alright then," The fox said, stepping aside, as if letting him go.

Before Shin could retort- _rudely_ he found himself in a tree. He blinked, thoroughly confused.

"What the-"

He looked up at the person holding him up. It was the blond boy. The clearing was empty. But next to the fox was a man Shin recalled from the bingo book as one of Kirigakure's own missing nins. One of those he had a good mind to stay away from.

"Aw hell," Shin frowned. He pushed himself away from the boy. "Run. I'll hold him off."

Deep blue eyes regarded him with amusement before the boy vanished. He reappeared a moment later, back next to Shin. Shin looked down at the clearing. The man was dead on the ground, slaughtered cleanly and the fox was glaring at them both.

"Naruto, you _asshole_!" the fox yelled. "_I_ wanted to kill him."

The blond, Naruto, just shrugged and mumbled a soft, "Moron."

Shin had stared between them both, wondering if he'd been caught in some weird genjutsu. No, he would have noticed. The blond was back on the ground, arguing heatedly with the fox.

Shin shook his head. They were…_interesting_.

Smiling softly to himself, he jumped down and joined them.

It was the first time anything interesting had happened to him and he wasn't about to just leave them.

They stared at him as he stood there, grinning stupidly at them both.

"Is he a retard?" Naruto asked, nudging Kyuubi with his elbow.

Kyuubi shrugged, as well as a fox could shrug and Shin cough, trying to stop grinning.

"Where are you two headed?" he asked abruptly.

"Nowhere," the blond answered.

"Great!" Shin grinned. "Let's go."

Naruto had looked at Shin like he was an idiot and then at Kyuubi.

Kyuubi had shrugged and they had walked away. Shin had grabbed the sack of money, putting it in his satchel. He let Naruto keep the coat.

They left the forest and Shin led them to Amegakure to his home.

They didn't ask him questions about his family or his wealth but he told them anyway. His family accepted the two strangers as his companions easily. The children loved Kyuubi and even when he threatened them with early deaths, they simply cooed at their new pet.

Naruto enjoyed watching Kyuubi suffer under toddlers' hands. It was calming.

They two of them stayed with Shin for a few weeks before getting restless and setting out again. The new head, Shin's younger brother Izuna, had given them gifts of clothing and money before they left. The whole family said goodbye and offered them a place to live if ever they needed it.

Shin had noticed Naruto's eyes glaze over at the easy acceptance given there but he hadn't pried. It wasn't his place to question the boy anyway.

When they left, Shin left with them. The two agreed to Shin's half-baked plan of attacking dangerous s-class nins and collecting the bounties- but Naruto had insisted that they give the bounties to families that needed them and not needing the money, Shin had agreed. Kyuubi didn't seem to care. Anything was fine with him as long as he got to kill something. The fox had some serious anger issues.

The three made a name for themselves in ninja circles as thorns in the sides of hidden villages. Because they killed many targets the villages wanted, they were added to the bingo books so they could get killed and not interfere with the economies of the villages.

They were free to move anywhere (as free as people in bingo books could be) and went to every country except for the Wind and Fire countries, which Naruto avoided like the plague. They'd even gone _around_ them twice, just to avoid being near their borders, which quite frankly, was retarded.

When Shin asked, Kyuubi muttered something about Naruto being allergic to sand and leaves and Shin shutting the hell up.

They became close friends and good partners, and sometimes when Shin was drunk, he'd claim they were the blond and fox brothers he never had.

**(I am an End-Of-Flashback Page break. I'm new and hip)**

Naruto made Kyuubi go back into the forest when the child stirred. There was no point in rescuing him just so he'd die from fright. It was almost night time so he made a fire, waiting for the boy to take in his surroundings.

The boy was no older than ten and burst into tears the moment he realized that he'd gone from one band of captors to another.

"Can I please knock him out again?" Shin pleaded.

The kid bawled even louder and Naruto threw shin an annoyed look.

"We won't hurt you," he assured the boy. "We're taking you home. You're from the Grass village aren't you?"

Eyeing Naruto wearily and wondering whether his tears would aid in sympathy or get him killed, the boy nodded and settled for sniffing and silent tears.

"Good," Naruto smiled warmly. "Do you have family there?"

The boy nodded again. "They couldn't afford the ransom," he said quietly.

Naruto frowned. "The men that took you?"

The boy nodded again, mumbling thanks when Naruto handed him an apple. "My family's poor but they asked for a lot of money."

"But they took you away from the village," Shin pointed out, moving closer to the fire.

"They wanted to sell me as a slave," he replied.

Seeing Naruto's eyes darken in anger, Shin coughed. "It's a good thing Kyuubi stopped them, then."

The boy looked at Shin for a moment. "I saw a picture of you outside a bathhouse."

They waited, wondering if the child would mention a bounty.

"You were banned from there," the kid said innocently. "For being a pervert."

Naruto choked back a laugh while Shin went into a long tirade about the art of watching beauty and-

Naruto tuned him out. When he got like that, he sounded like Jiraiya. Naruto wondered if he was forever cursed to be the student of perverts. From Kakashi to Jiraiya to Shin. If he thought about it, there was a strong chance Iruka had an inner perv.

Naruto felt mild annoyance and sighed.

Kyuubi must have been near the camp site.

He waited but Kyuubi stayed away.

Naruto shrugged and went back to listening to Shin argue with the boy.

Because he and Kyuubi had stayed together even after the exile, their close proximity increased their awareness of each other. Naruto could feel Kyuubi's emotions and the only reason they still hadn't mastered communicating by thought was because Naruto thought that would be crossing some serious boundaries. He'd already lived most of his life with Kyuubi in his head. He was kind of enjoying the perks of thinking anything he liked without background commentary. Not that Kyuubi failed to provide commentary just because he wasn't sealed in Naruto.

They rarely talked about the bond… Kyuubi suspected that was because talking about it would lead to talking about the third person they shared the bond with.

Sasuke.

Naruto lay down and stared up at the stars.

Sasuke was still alive, that much was obvious by the very fact that he and Kyuubi were still alive. Which had been a gamble at the time cause Naruto was positive that there were some people who'd gladly die if they could get revenge on others by it.

And Sasuke did have a thing for revenge.

The way Naruto saw it, Sasuke would make sure he lived long enough to make Naruto suffer.

Naruto's emotional connection to Sasuke had worn off during the week after his exile. Before it did, it had almost seemed like he could read words in the bitterness and anger he felt from the Uchiha.

_You betrayed me_…_how could you leave_…_You're __**dead**__ when I find you_…

Naruto took the first watch sitting with Kyuubi in a tree. He knew there wouldn't be a _second_ watch, especially when Shin knew that even if he fell asleep, Naruto and Kyuubi would protect his sorry ass.

"You're thinking about him again," Kyuubi stated, staring down at the camp site where the boy was fast asleep and Shin was poking at the fire.

"You ask me that everyday and everyday I say no," Naruto pointed out. He dropped the genjutsu he usually had over himself and two tails appeared behind him, the same colour as his hair. They wrapped themselves around his torso, keeping him warm.

"I expect you'll tire of lying after a few years."

Naruto rolled his eyes and leaned against the tree trunk, running a hand through his hair.

"Say I said yes, what then?"

Kyuubi huffed, amazed at Naruto's stupidity. "You shouldn't have left him behind."

"You should have mentioned that three years ago," Naruto offered dryly.

"I did," Kyuubi retorted. "You were too busy being chivalrous."

"It was the right thing to do," the blond replied irritably.

"I never said it wasn't," Kyuubi grinned.

Naruto made a face at him and turned away.

Sasuke was safe in Konoha. That was all that mattered.

**(I am a South Park page break. You killed Kenny. You BASTARDS!)**

Naruto was glad when they _finally_ reached the Grass village.

Apart from the itchiness he felt from all the tall grass he'd walked had to walk in just to get to the village's front gates, he was fine. Shin and him were glamoured as weary travelers while Kyuubi was with them as a small black fox, resting on Shin's head.

Shin flirted with the two women who were on duty at the gate, explaining that he'd brought a child who'd been kidnapped. They ooh-ed, aah-ed and winked at him until Naruto pointed out that they were all ignoring the child they were supposed to be fussing over. The boy sheepishly hid behind Naruto and only came out once he saw a woman walking dejectedly toward a small shop.

"MOM!"

The woman looked up, shock and hope in her eyes. She stared as the boy ran to her, hugging him and bursting into tears.

When the kid turned, trying to point out who had helped him, no one was there.

**(I am a cool page break. Brr)**

"You didn't even ask the kid for his name," Kyuubi said dryly when they entered their hotel room, making himself a bit bigger.

"Mm, tragic," Naruto said absently, dropping his glamour genjutsu and stepping into the bathroom.

Shin was going through all the rooms, touching stuff and being a nuisance to no one but himself.

Naruto took a long shower and came out to find Shin at a large window overlooking some of the village.

Naruto nodded at Kyuubi, letting the fox feel his curiosity.

Kyuubi, from his place on the couch, muttered, "His hobby."

Ah yes, women watching.

"There's a bath house next door," Shin whispered reverently, kneeling at the window pressing himself against the glass.

"You're cleaning that window if you get anything on it," Naruto said sternly.

"It's like we carried Jiraiya with us," Kyuubi sighed, closing his eyes and settling in for a nap.

Naruto rolled his eyes and went into his room. They always enjoyed the luxuries of suites in the hotels they stayed at when passing through various villages. It almost made up for all the mud, dirt and blood they were usually covered in when roughing it while travelling.

Naruto decided a nap was in order and promptly fell asleep.

His dreams were the same as they always were…alternate realities where things were different.

He smiled in his sleep.

**(I am a tired page break. Carry me)**

_Sasuke moved Naruto off his lap only to shift his body so he was lying on the couch with Naruto._

_He kissed the blond again, one hand coming up to cup Naruto's cheek while the other wrapped around his waist and pulled him closer. _

_The kiss had definitely evolved from the gentle rubbish they'd been doing seconds before. Tongues dueled and bodies writhed. _

_Hands started to wander and Naruto shivered when Sasuke traced his spine. Wanting to get more than the occasional groans from the brunet, he shifted up, his thigh pressing insistently against Sasuke's groin._

_Sasuke moaned loudly into Naruto's mouth and Naruto grinned, before Sasuke exacted revenge by pressing his own thigh into Naruto hardened length and starting to rock shamelessly against him._

_If that was how Sasuke liked his revenge then dammit Naruto would be an avenger, too!_

_Naruto licked a trail down Sasuke's throat before biting down harshly, marking him. Sasuke seemed to be into biting too, cause he moaned audibly and pulled Naruto back up to resume their scorching kisses._

_The friction from their rocking- which quickly became thrusting- was egging them on. Moans, groans and frantic whispers filled the room (along with the evil laughter from the TV) and drove on their erratic movements._

_Sasuke kissed Naruto hungrily, trying to wrap himself closer to the blond. Naruto obliged by wrapping his hands_

_They were so into the kissing and rutting they didn't realize all their moving meant they'd run out of couch and-_

"_Ow, dammit!" Sasuke groaned when his back connected with the floor._

"_Well, there's nothing else to fall off of," Naruto chuckled before Sasuke shut him up with a kiss._

_They were still both hard after all._

_Naruto wondered for a moment if Sasuke realized that this made him gay but decided it was something he probably shouldn't bring up at the moment._

_He placed his hands on Sasuke's waist and drove forward again and again. Beneath him, Sasuke moaned deeply, matching his pace to Naruto's. _

_Needing more, Naruto spun them so he was on the ground. He moved his legs to either side of Sasuke's hips and pulled Sasuke back down to him. The friction was amazing._

_He felt Sasuke's cock pressed against his own harder and faster and he groaned, wrapping his arms around Sasuke's back and raising his hips off the floor in quick, sharp movements._

_The kiss grew messy as their thrusts grew erratic. Naruto's shout was muffled by Sasuke's mouth right before Sasuke let out a keening groan of his own. They shuddered and shivered against each other, riding out their orgasms for as long as they could before sagging against each other._

"_Wow," Naruto whispered, his forehead pressed against Sasuke's. _

_Sasuke tensed for just a moment before he relaxed. His hands slid over Naruto's clothed back and he smiled lazily._

_Soft breath was on his lips and he shifted eagerly._

_Naruto moaned softly and captured Sasuke's mouth in a searing kiss._

"_Are you tired?" Sasuke whispered._

_Naruto snorted in answer and smiled softly, taking Sasuke's hand in his. "Bed room?"  
>It was a sign of the apocalypse that Sasuke nodded slowly, his eyes growing even darker with lust before he nodded.<em>

x-xxx-xx-xxx-xx-xxx

"_You were going to leave without me."_

_Naruto smiled sadly. "That was the plan, yes. But I suppose I decided I didn't want to not say goodbye."_

_Sasuke's heart was racing. "You're not leaving without me."  
>"Sasuke-"<br>"Please."  
>The words were softly spoken but Naruto knew the pain and hurt they failed to hide. But he couldn't protect Sasuke. Danzou's capture had been proof of that and if Sasuke left with Naruto, he'd be targeted as well and taken as a missing nin. Again. <em>

_Naruto didn't want that. Sasuke had a future here. He could be happy. If Naruto was going to live like a felon, he didn't want Sasuke getting injured or captured or hurt because of him. And as long as Danzou didn't have Kyuubi or Naruto, he couldn't complete the control jutsu- if he even managed to find another way to do it considering he'd used his last try and failed._

_Naruto frowned thoughtfully. Sasuke was important to him. He always had been and this was his way of protecting him- keeping him as far away as possible. It was the only way he would always be safe…and have the family and friends that Konoha could give him._

_Naruto wouldn't delude himself into thinking Sasuke would always be with him and never change his mind. It was enough that he had wanted him last night. That was a memory he'd treasure forever._

_But, he knew, if Sasuke asked him to take him- just one more time- he'd agree in a heartbeat._

"_Konoha is your home, Sasuke." Naruto said calmly. "Not mine. I won't take it away from you."_

"_I'm coming with you. Naruto, I-"_

_The next moment, Naruto was right behind him and Sasuke was reminded of Sakura's attempt to make him stay._

_Soft lips brushed the nape of his neck._

"_I love you, Sasuke."_

**(I am an alarm clock page break. Wake up losers)**

Naruto woke up abruptly and was almost glad the dream had ended there. It would have been torture for him to have continued to replay his last moment with Sasuke.

His wrist was burning, reminding him of exactly what woke him up. He swore loudly when he glanced at it.

There was a black mark coiled around it, almost like a bracelet. He scowled deeply. There was no way Kyuubi or Shin would attempt suicide by tattooing him in his sleep. And he'd have woken up if they'd tried.

He ran his hand through his hair, still staring at the marked wrist before taking note of his surroundings.

The suite was eerily quiet.

That wasn't unusual though if Kyuubi was asleep and Shin was still watching naked girls.

He walked into the main living area and scowled.

Kyuubi was awake and Shin wasn't alone at the window.

Naruto stared in disbelief at the white haired man sitting next to Shin and drawing lewd pictures of the bathing women. Neither men paid him any attention.

Naruto turned to Kyuubi.

"I died in my sleep, didn't I?"

"And found Jiraiya in the afterlife?" Kyuubi inquired dryly from his place on the couch.

"Aw crap. I'm in hell."

Jiraiya huffed in annoyance and looked at Naruto as if to say he should be quiet. As if it was everyday that he met exiled missing nins and perved at women from their hotel suites.

"Jiraiya."

"hey Naruto. Great view you got here."

"Mhmm," Naruto sighed. "What are you doing here?"

Jiraiya was in no way a threat and his getting in without a fuss from Kyuubi proved that much, even if Kyuubi hadn't met him while in this form.

And Jiraiya wasn't freaking out over the fox on the couch so it was possible that he'd gone to Konoha and Tsunade had filled him in on the whole Danzou-Kyuubi-Kit-Bond-Sasuke issue.

Naruto saw Jiraiya glance at his wrist and smile softly. Anyone else would have missed it.

Naruto caught the look and stared down at his arm.

It was burning slightly where that mark had appeared.

He growled at Jiraiya. "What do you know about this?"

Jiraiya's smile turned into a full-blown grin and he motioned for Naruto to sit.

**(I am an old page break. I fart dust)**

**Name**: Sasuke Uchiha

**Age**: 21

**Class**: S-class missing nin, former Konoha ANBU

**Purpose in Life:** Revenge. Again.

**Current State of Said Purpose in Life**: Getting there…

Sasuke stared at the woman who was brazenly trying to seduce him in a public park. She was smiling, fluttering her eyelashes and somehow, her clothing seemed to be slipping off her body as if by magic.

"No one's here," she purred, touching his hand.

No other people were around but there was duck and her seven ducklings at the nearby pond, all watching Sasuke and the woman with wide, innocent eyes.

"Ducks," Sasuke said, nodding at the ducklings.

The woman looked at him and giggled, deciding he was joking.

Sasuke sighed as she leaned in to kiss him.

Killing her when she hadn't really done anything but follow him around (and try to have sex with him in a public park) was probably something that would be considered _illegal_.

He wondered briefly if he could claim that it was a crime of passion.

_Yes, your honour, Anbu captain sir, we were in a passionate, heated embrace and I accidentally set her on fire. What's that? Why did I do it? Like I said…It was a heated embrace…_

Without the use of a scroll, Sasuke surreptitiously summoned a snake. It landed on the woman's head and after a moment's confusion, she screamed and fell in a dead faint.

The snake hissed in snaky laughter and nodded at Sasuke, vanishing again.

Sasuke sighed and shifted in his seat. His genjutsu didn't make the fact that he had a tail any easier. It wasn't something he could easily forget even if he kept anyone else from seeing it.

And it made sure he never forgot his goal.

His tails were a good reminder after all.

_Naruto_.

It was like their roles had been reversed.

This time, Sasuke was chasing after the blond. He liked to think it was different though, seeing as how he hadn't found Naruto even once and he never spewed nonsense about bonds and 'I'll bring you back to the village'. Those were quiet significant differences.

It was strange though, that he never ran into Naruto. His sources were amazingly accurate and he'd been seen in all the places Sasuke had searched but it was always with at least a few hours in between. That had Sasuke seriously pissed off- that he kept missing Naruto by just hours.

He'd considered getting team Taka back together again but he thought of having to bite Karin if ever he needed help and shivered. He'd really rather not. And he couldn't babysit both Juugo and Suigetsu when he had things to concentrate on. Besides, he'd heard they were each doing fine on their own and even though he knew they'd jump at the chance to help him again, there was no point.

He'd find Naruto using his own power.

Finding Naruto was important…because once he did, the blond would pay.

The woman on the ground stirred and Sasuke rolled his eyes, summoning another snake. She fainted again and he sighed.

The scenery in the hidden grass village was really beautiful.

**(I am a vegan page break. Eat me, not meat)**

Sasuke sat at his motel's bar, glaring at women when they started to approach.

They approached anyway.

Sasuke sighed, annoyed, as he went to the bathroom. Telling women off seemed to have no effect when the only thing they bothered noticing was that he was talking to them.

He shut the door behind him and Body Flickered to the motel's roof.

Sasuke sat down and watched the people moving below him. He was beginning to think that maybe he wouldn't find Naruto. The blond was doing a damn good job of hiding and always keeping one step ahead of Sasuke.

Sasuke glared at the sky. Did Naruto know he was after him? It would make sense. But then, he wouldn't be taunting Sasuke the way he was.

Sasuke had heard of the man he was moving with. Apparently him, Naruto and Kyuubi went everywhere together.

A spark on the ground alerted Sasuke to the fact that he had unconsciously activated his full body chidori. He sighed and controlled his chakra.

When he found that man, Shin his sources called him, he was going to make him die _slowly_.

A sharp pain in his wrist had him staring down at it. Had he twisted it sometime?

Sasuke frowned at his wrist.

There was a blue mark and it was burning something fierce. Had that waitress put something in his drink?

No way. He'd have noticed.

He sighed and decided to leave the motel. There was no point in worrying about something he had no idea about. The best thing would be to get information about it and if it was anything harmful, find and _kill_ whoever had placed it on him.

Before he could Body Flicker away again, someone appeared next to him.

Sasuke looked blankly at the man, wondering whether he should bother pulling out his sword.

"What do you want Kakashi?"

Kakashi's eye crinkled in that way that indicated he was smiling. "Uh…to bring you back to the village?"

"Who are you, Naruto?" Sasuke scoffed.

"No," Kakashi smirked. "But I know where Naruto is."

Sasuke smiled maliciously.

"Lead the way then."

Kakashi rolled his eyes. He knew that if he wanted, Sasuke would kill him in a heartbeat. He wasn't what he used to be. And Sasuke had apparently been busy on his vacation away from Konoha.

The rumours he'd heard were disconcerting.

Kakashi led Sasuke onto the street below. "So…how've you been?"

Sasuke grunted in answer.

"Good. Meet any interesting people?"

"Hn."

"Really? I thought he was dead…"

Apparently, Kakashi understood Uchiha-ese.

"Have you been in touch with Itachi lately?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes at that.

Kakashi already knew the answer to that. Itachi and Sasuke met occasionally and sparred viciously before parting ways again. Their strangely violent reunions were the reason most people still thought Sasuke was trying to kill Itachi.

"I heard someone say you were looking for Naruto."

"Hn."

"Any particular reason?"

Sasuke ignored Kakashi then, instead choosing to walk in silence.

Kakashi followed his lead and didn't speak anymore, glad his mask could hide his triumphant smirk.

**(I am a Jiraiya page break. Come get me ladies!)**

When Jiraiya went to open the door to their hotel room after a knock sounded, Naruto wondered if maybe the old guy was making himself too comfortable there. Sure he wasn't a threat but if he was still loyal to Konoha, it was possible he was being followed on the chance that he met Naruto.

Granted, that wasn't particularly alarming as Naruto was sure he could take the Konoha Anbu on but _still_…

Naruto frowned when Pakkun came in followed closely by Jiraiya who was talking to the dog.

"Where's Kakashi?"

"He's in the village. A few blocks from here."

"He found him?"

"Yes."

"And Kakashi's still alive?"

"For now."

Jiraiya nodded and smiled at Naruto, who was eyeing him warily. "Who are you looking for?"

Before Jiraiya could answer, two people Body Flickered into the room.

Naruto's eyes widened and he wished Kyuubi would suddenly become a giant demon fox and attack this village. He needed a distraction of _that_ scale to be able to escape the one person he'd been keeping away from all these years.

Sasuke seemed to maybe be considering the same.

Naruto and Sasuke stared at each other, not saying anything.

"Hey Sasuke," Kyuubi greeted.

From his place at the window, now holding binoculars, Shin waved absently at the two new people in the room. Jiraiya motioned for Kakashi to join them at the window and he accepted graciously.

Kyuubi sighed, watching them. "Retards."

Kakashi, Shin and Jiraiya settled down at the window, all watching and taking notes.

"What are you doing here?" Naruto asked Sasuke finally, his voice cold.

Sasuke was surprised.

Naruto had changed, a lot. His hair was longer and it suited him. His scratched headband was hanging loosely from his neck and just added to the whole rogue look he seemed to be going for. He was dressed like a civilian and looked…well…he looked good enough to eat.

Sasuke's mouth watered but he reminded himself that this was the man who'd slept with him and left him behind.

Forgiveness was so not welcome here.

Naruto watched Sasuke with burning curiosity as the brunet eyed him back.

He saw the once-over Sasuke had given him and something deep down inside had twisted uncomfortably when Sasuke's eyes had just turned indifferent after his perusal.

What a jackass.

"It's a free country, isn't it?" Sasuke asked, seeming uncaring as he turned to watch what Jiraiya and Kakashi were doing.

Naruto bristled at the clear dismissal but enjoyed the change of profile.

He'd always dreamed of him and Sasuke meeting again and not just the pervy wet dreams.

In his day dreams, Sasuke was married to a battle-ax of a woman and was haggard and old, wrinkled and tired from being a family man. They were satisfying dreams.

But here he was and the stupid, inconsiderate bastard didn't even have a bloody blemish or a scar or _something_. He was his perfect damn self.

Just like he'd always been.

And Naruto's body noted that efficiently, buzzing as it remembered the last time it had been with Sasuke.

_Damn it_.

The beautiful pale skin was just calling him to touch it. That dark, gravity-defying hair was _begging_ for his fingers to muss it up…

Naruto took a wary step back.

It wouldn't do to entertain thoughts of Sasuke. And him. In a bed. Having _amazing-_

"Well," Jiraiya clapped his hands, startling Naruto out of his gutter-ridden thoughts. "We have a message for you both that concerns those tattoos you suddenly have!"

Sasuke looked at his wrist and frowned. "_You're_ responsible for this?"

Jiraiya tossed a scroll at Sasuke. Sasuke looked at it and glared when Jiraiya told him the necessary hand signs to do to activate it. Apparently Jiraiya was too busy gathering material for his next book. The other two were just perving.

Sasuke made the necessary signs and pressed his palm to the open scroll.

He stood back and a second later, an image of Tsunade sitting at a desk appeared.

She seemed surprised and dropped her sake.

"Sasuke!" she coughed guiltily. "Funny seeing you here."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at her and she smiled, hiding her sake. "Er…I suppose Kakashi found you."

"Hn."

"I told him not to activate the scroll until they found you _and_ Naruto."

Sasuke nodded at Naruto and Tsunade turned.

"Oh!" she frowned. "Huh, that was fast."

She shook her head. "Anyway, I'm sure you both noticed the bond marks on your wrists."

When they didn't speak she continued. "Yes, well, those are my doing and you'll feel them burn or inflict injury in a number of conditions. One would be when you disobey me."

They both growled at her and she ignored them.

"Another would be when you resist it," she smiled smugly. "I went through the trouble of mixing a loyalty jutsu along with a marriage jutsu, on you two alone of course cause adding myself to that would just be weird. Anyway, I also added a dash of a summoning jutsu so you do as I say and find your way to me. Oh, by the way, you _will_ feel the need and effects of all these jutsus so do try to follow through with them."

They were silent a full moment before any reaction was given.

"Marriage jutsu." Sasuke deapanned finally, staring at the image of a grinning Tsunade. "You placed a _marriage jutsu_ on me and the idiot?"

Naruto didn't say anything. He had just jumped out the window in a random suicide attempt.

Or maybe he was trying to run away again.

Sasuke rolled his eyes and turned back to Tsunade.

"When I find you, I _will_ kill you."

Tsunade waved her hands airily, dismissing his threat. "Yes, yes. You have a month to find the girls and train with them."

"What girls? Train for _what_?"

"We're taking Konoha back."

With that, Tsunade disappeared.

Naruto had just been thrown back in through the window by Kyuubi and his wounds had already healed. He looked at Sasuke and stared at the window again, weighing his options.

Before he could jump back out and try to properly kill himself, Sasuke pinned him to the wall.

"You might not remember," Sasuke whispered in his ear, pressing his body to the blond's. "But your life is tied to mine. If you die, _I_ die."

Naruto swallowed, turning his face to the side. "How could I forget being bonded to an asshole like y-"

He cut off with a gasp as Sasuke's tongue licked a long, clean swipe against his throat.

Before Naruto could push him away, Sasuke pulled back and walked toward Kyuubi.

Kyuubi seemed highly amused while Kakashi and Jiraiya were looking over the fence at the women's bath house outside.

Naruto frowned, moving away from the wall and glaring at Sasuke.

Sasuke smirked.

Revenge never grew old. At least, not for him.

x-x

**A/N: Hiya! *waves* I wrote this ages ago so I hope you enjoy it. **

**Chapter 2 summary: Sasuke and Naruto are forced to help Tsunade and Shizune get Sakura and Hinata while experiencing the first few effects of the jutsu…**

**x-x**

**For Sasuke and Naruto being fluffy, press 1**

**For death to the author for making a sequel, press 2**

**For the continuation of the fic **_**and**_** world domination, press 3**

**x-x**

**For 'why the hell aren't the above buttons working?', click the review button below and leave a message.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Door To December**

by Rizember

xxx-xxx

**A/N: I corrected the formatting from the crap it was before. Blame fanfiction (dot) net or blame my phone. Either way, updates may be slow as I have tests, mid-terms, projects and assignments… I'm screwed.**

**Xx-xx**

**Chapter 2: Joining the Cause**

xxx-xxx

**Name**: Bunch of Random Ninjas.

**Members**: Naruto, Sasuke, Itachi, Shin, Kakashi, Jiraiya

**Age**: Varying from twenty-one to sometime before evolution began.

**Class**: Altogether, they might make one intelligent genin. However, each is considered S-class and deadly- especially now that their idiocy and power have been combined.

**Current purpose in Life**: Girls, naked girls, naked Naruto, avoiding Sasuke, world domination... Depends on who you ask, really.

**Current state of said purpose in life**: They're all pretty much screwed.

Xxx-xxX

"On a scale of one to ten, just how girly do you think you're being?" Kyuubi asked curiously, writing in the dust with one of his tails. "Cause this is what I'd give you."

Naruto looked at the number Kyuubi had just written and frowned. "An eight?"

"Infinity. Your balls must be in Sasuke's purse."

Naruto shot him a glare and continued to stare out over the roof into the night sky.

To say he was pissed was like saying hell was mild.

Pissed just didn't cut it.

He wanted to go out on a rampage.

He wanted to kick baby pandas and make koala bears go extinct.

He wanted to hunt and exterminate little cute woodland creatures- and maybe get Kyuubi to rape quite a few of them...

But most of all...he just wanted Sasuke gone.

It was just like the bastard to ruin three years of perfectly good avoidance.

Never mind that Tsunade was kind of the reason for all this and was to blame for everything.

No.

Never mind that.

Naruto's mind was made up and it was all _Sasuke's _fault.

Because his logic was cool like that.

After Tsunade's little surprise jutsu announcement and Sasuke's impromptu _lick_, Naruto had escaped to the hotel's roof. His chakra was perfectly hidden and he lay down, having complete faith in his ability to not be found.

Kyuubi was lying by his side, like a bored shadow, staring up at the sky and offering free sarcasm and wit, because according to him, the best things in life were free (unless you wanted mind-blowing sex, which you sometimes had to pay for).

Naruto had a good mind to kill the fox and put himself out of his misery.

The bond he had with Kyuubi had just grown stronger over the years they'd been in exile together.

It was now at the point where if they really tried, concentrated and stopped arguing long enough, they could read each other's minds and feel each other's pain.

He also knew that because he and Kyuubi had been away from Sasuke so long, the bond would try to renew itself and adjust to the three of them being together.

Naruto had done some research during his travels and found out that with long distance, the only thing that would affect Sasuke's life would be their death. Everything else was insignificant.

Or would have been insignificant...

If the fool hadn't come looking for him.

Ungrateful bastard that he was.

After all he'd done for Sasuke, leaving so he could have the perfect Konoha life, revive his little clan and not have to stress over incomplete three-way bonds, he repaid the blond by doing _none _of that.

"Calm down, ya pansy," Kyuubi yawned. "If you're gonna brood, do it on your own time."

Naruto took in a deep breath and settled against Kyuubi.

The fox didn't point out how gay that was, instead wrapping his tails around Naruto's chilly form and settling in for the night.

_**Meanwhile, inside the building...**_

Sasuke lay back down on the bed, staring at the ceiling.

Naruto was pretty good.

He couldn't sense his chakra at all.

Of course, that didn't help much when Sasuke had already planted a tracer on him and knew he was on the roof. The tracer, a tiny rude, obnoxious snake called Kaori was in Naruto's pocket, fast asleep. It sent Sasuke visual and vocal messages of what he observed and he'd relayed the fact that Naruto had been swearing at Sasuke for the past half hour. It also added that the blond was amazingly creative with his swear words.

Sasuke smirked as he continued to stare blankly at the ceiling.

After Tsunade's pleasant announcement, Naruto and Kyuubi had disappeared. He knew the blond probably didn't want to be around him but Sasuke would have none of that.

He'd let the blond have his little tantrum but come morning...

Well.

In his time away, Sasuke had brushed up on the failed jutsu. He'd taken notes, obtained information and guessed at quite a few things.

Now that Naruto was within his reach, Sasuke would have him. And with Tsunade's jutsu ensuring that Naruto couldn't run away, it was a done deal.

Sasuke would soon have his vengeance against Naruto. Cause really, who was he if not an Avenger?

His black tail twitched excitedly beneath him and he chuckled before settling down to sleep.

The three stooges were still planted by the window, only ever moving for potty breaks since Sasuke had informed them that if they even so much as tried to pee in a bottle right there in the living room, he'd see to it that they never had to pee again.

**(I am a pervert page break. Time to see some tittaaaays!)**

Naruto's morning was alright.

It wasn't good, it wasn't bad...it was just...alright.

He and Kyuubi had BodyFlickered into the apartment before dawn to get some breakfast and had noticed Shin, Kakashi and Jiraiya all asleep at the window.

Tempted to toss them out, Naruto had quickly gone to the kitchen area and poured himself a bowl of cereal while Kyuubi went about doing unspeakable things to chicken.

It always pleased Naruto to know that most hotels and motels in the hidden villages tended to provide kitchens in the suites for shinobi too paranoid to have room service.

He figured Sasuke was still asleep and was infinitely grateful for that because he had a lot to-

"Good morning."

Naruto paled and bit back an irritated sigh.

He looked up at Sasuke and nodded in acknowledgement.

"Morning Kyuubi."

Kyuubi growled in answer, waving his tails at Sasuke in greeting. Sasuke chuckled at the two and moved to make himself some breakfast.

As he walked passed Naruto, his tail casually slid over the blond's two golden tails, wrapping around them and stroking once, and Naruto immediately stiffened.

Sasuke mumbled an absentminded apology and continued on his quest for eggs and bacon.

He didn't turn around to see Naruto's red face, didn't see the goosebumps running along Naruto's arms...didn't hear the barely audible gasp...

He did however, see Naruto's back as he hurriedly left the kitchen.

Kyuubi was staring at the Uchiha with an amused smirk in place. "You did that on purpose."

Sasuke gave Kyuubi a blank look. "Did what?"

Kyuubi simply chuckled and continued to demolish the large chicken Naruto had gotten him from the fridge.

He didn't need to look up at the Uchiha to see the triumphant smirk on the brunet's face.

Naruto was a calm, collected and competent ninja and in under twenty-four hours, Sasuke had managed to have all that shot to hell.

Kyuubi was betting on Naruto regrouping and getting his act together soon. Naruto could be as stubborn and unmoving as a rock and also had the point of keeping his new reputation as incentive to keep Sasuke away from him.

But Kyuubi also knew the Uchiha seemed pretty determined to have Naruto and was likely to do anything to get him.

It would be an interesting battle of wills.

**(I am a rude page break. You're a dumbass)**

Naruto spent the rest of the morning beating up an unsuspecting tree to such a degree that the poor thing prayed fervently that it could be reborn as a falling rock so it could squish him.

When he got back, he was tired, sweaty and quite irritated to find that Jiraiya, Shin and Kakashi were all still camping out by the window. Now, however, they had sheets of paper surrounding them, some had numbered charts that looked like they were ratings of the women they'd watched while others had actual drawings of the women they were watching.

Naruto smirked, feeling particularly evil.

He BodyFlickered away and went to the bathhouse. So as not to cause any suspicion, he quickly called each woman aside, told them what was going on, gave them the three stooges' descriptions and hotel room number and quickly took their place with clones of them before returning BodyFlickering back to the hotel where he stood smugly by the three men.

He waited.

The women would get dressed hurriedly in their pissed off bloodthirsty mood but he gave them five minutes. In the mean time-

Jiraiya scowled. "All the women are-"

Naruto chuckled darkly, "Old fat guys?"

He'd made all his clones change form, into a naked Jiraiya who was then doing 'the wiggle'.

"AH MY _EYES_!" Shin screamed, scrambling back and clawing at his eyes.

Kakashi had taken wisdom from Naruto and had jumped out the window, hopefully to his death, to rid himself of the image he knew he could never un-see.

Naruto chuckled as his naked jiraiya clones accosted the eyes of the three perverts It served them right.

Jiraiya was apparently in shock, not knowing whether to take offense to the fact that Naruto was advertising his bits or that the other two men were blowing chunks (he was sure he could hear Kakashi moaning about broken bones while he puked).

He wasn't that fat, was he?

Jiraiya stared down at his stomach and Naruto chuckled. "Yes, you are that fat."

With that bit of revenge done for now, Naruto figured he'd go take care of Sasuke at the moment.

He sensed the Uchiha's chakra in his room and was almost completely sure of his plan.

Getting to Sasuke, or getting rid of Sasuke, would be impossible while the stupid jutsu was present, if Tsunade was to be believed.

And killing Sasuke would really be counter-productive.

It would be easier to just make the Uchiha hate him again. Like he had before.

Couldn't be that hard.

Maybe he'd just crack a few dead Uchiha jokes or something.

Okay, no...that would be mean...

Naruto paused, standing right outside the door to his room.

He could always kill Itachi...

But...that would just make Sasuke chase after him in full avenger mode and he was trying to get rid of him, not leave him emotionally scarred and vengeful.

Well, without murdering anybody, the blond was sure he could get Sauske to hate him again. He'd just use different ammunition.

And then, when he found Tsunade, he'd kill her (which would hopefully kill the jutsu as well) and then risk Sakura becoming the next avenger.

He was pretty sure he could take her.

For now, he couldn't leave. He knew fairly little about the marriage jutsu and as such, it would be an extremely idiotic move on his part to even attempt to escape with what he was sure was a tattoo-like mannacle on his wrist.

Sighing, he nodded to himself and walked into the room only to be tackled to the ground.

Naruto glared at Sasuke who was smirking as he held the blond down, as if he was a little boy who'd just learned to go potty all by himself.

"You're looking alittle too smug for someone who's just pinned me," Naruto said calmly, giving Sasuke a smirk of his own.

Naruto's sudden smirk, one to match the Uchiha's perfectly, was highly suspect and Sasuke wisely held on tighter only to be surprised when he found himself surrounded by Naruto's clones.

He definitely hadn't seen the boy make any hand signs, not even one-handed.

"How-"

Naruto simply laughed darkly as his clones suddenly removed Sasuke off him and held the Uchiha down.

The blond then got up off the ground and moved to smile down at the glaring Uchiha.

"If you wanted me so bad, Sasuke, all you had to do was ask."

Sasuke's scoff turned into a choked sound when Naruto quickly straddled him. The clones were successfully pinning Sasuke's hands and legs.

Naruto lowered himself until he was draped across Sasuke.

Sasuke watched, suddenly transfixed, waiting to see what Naruto would do next.

The blond completely surprised him by abruptly planting a soft kiss on his lips.

"I really missed you while I was away, Sasuke," he whispered, placing another kiss on the Uchiha's lips.

He trailed wet kisses along Sasuke's jaw to his ears, nibbling on them. Sasuke jerked, sucking in a breath and turning his head to accommodate Naruto.

"I wanted to do so many things to you," Naruto said with a heady moan as he started to slowly rock against Sasuke.

Sasuke was finding it hard to breathe and shut his eyes in an effort to concentrate. He'd come down there with the purpose of turning Naruto into a quivering needy mess and yet, somehow the blond had turned the tables on him.

Naruto licked at Sasuke's neck before just sucking outright, knowing he was probably leaving a mark.

Sasuke gasped as Naruto bit down harshly and the blond shifted and pressed his mouth to Sasuke's, slipping his tongue into the other boy's mouth and groaning at the feel as he teased and traced every part of Sasuke's mouth with his tongue.

Sasuke moaned, mentally taking back every bad thing he'd ever thought about Naruto.

The blond was amazing.

He was already hard and gasped when he felt an answering erection brush against his own.

And then, just when Sasuke's brain jumpstarted and suggested that maybe he should really get involved, Sasuke ran his tongue against Naruto's, earning a shiver.

Encouraged, he smiled against the blond's mouth and bit down hard on Naruto's lower lip. The reaction he got was completely unexpected.

There was a loud resounding pop and the sudden splinter in his lip made his blood boil.

He opened his eyes and glared at the log on top of him.

Kawari.

Naruto had used the replacement jutsu on him.

And he was now kissing a block of wood.

Sasuke growled angrily, struggling against the arms of the clones that were still holding him down.

They immediately let go of him, winked and vanished.

Sasuke swore loudly, looking down at his obvious arousal.

He was going to _kill _Naruto.

**(I am a smartass page break. Duh.)**

**Name**: Hinata Hyuuga

**Age**: Twenty-one

**Class**: Crazy mofo...er, I mean S-class Suna ANBU captain (and genjutsu specialist)

**Current purpose in Life**: None whatsoever.

**Current state of purpose in life**: Going quite well, actually.

-ss-

The kazekage was annoyed.

The report he'd just read clearly stated that a criminal called the 'masked bandit' had struck again.

What was even more annoying was that the citizens couldn't even give the criminal a better name.

People usually ended up dead for much less than just annoying him.

Apparently the person always wore a complete ninja assassin outfit, head to toe black with only a slit for the eyes.

Everyone however, said the bandit's eyes were a different colour and there was even one woman who'd been convinced he had no eyes but Gaara knew better.

It was someone skilled enough with genjutsu that all the genjutsu-based Anbu techniques failed.

That probably meant it was a bloodline limit.

Gaara rubbed a tired hand over his face.

He was at Suna's Anbu headquarters, having decided against calling the Anbu captain to his office.

While Anbu were technically supposed to be practically invisible, the new captain had insisted that they get their own building, even if the rest of the Anbu would never be there. Gaara had agreed so he didn't have to just kill the irritating captain. Besides, only the captain used the building, taking it as a personal vacation home.

Gaara braced himself and stepped into the Captain's office, a long rectangular room with the Captain sitting lazily in a chair at the opposite end.

His sand caught the dagger that was aimed at his groin and he scowled. He walked forward, dodging a specially-made sword that looked like it had enough chakra in it to pass clearly through his sand and cut him in half from his balls.

Caught between amusement and irritation, Gaara BodyFlickered past the steel-toed boot that was set to kick him in the nuts.

Finally, after a few more attacks at his lower regions, he was at the Anbu captain's desk.

He didn't sit in the free chair, only briefly wondering what ball-crushing ambush was placed there.

Gaara sighed as he faced his Anbu captain with a tolerant gaze.

She wore no mask and was reclining leisurely in her comfy office chair.

She claimed she never wore a mask because she didn't see the point.

That, and she wanted everyone to know she was a badass and could kick all their asses.

"Hinata," Gaara scowled. "Do you really need all those booby traps just for someone to have a meeting with you?"

Hinata smiled. "If they can handle those, they can see me."

Gaara counted to ten. "Why are they all aimed at destroying the male groin?"

She blinked. "They _are_?"

Gaara stifled a groan.

"Your 'office meetings' produce more casualties than ninjas out on actual missions."

Hinata nodded seriously, her short dark hair swishing with the movement. "You'd think they'd know better than to meet me, then."

"You call them in here," he reminded her.

"I do?" Hinata asked, gray eyes wide. "Whatever for?"

Gaara gave her a level look. "I'm the Kazekage and I got through only after using quiet a bit of chakra, myself."

Hinata clapped. "Exactly! I want all of them to be kage-level ninjas."

Gaara refrained from arguing that point. Hinata had a way with winning arguments through the use of utter nonsense.

"So what do you need?" she asked, finally sitting up and not minding at all that the kazekage was still standing.

It had taken a while but now, almost all the citizens in Suna were completely free with Hinata as their Anbu captain.

There'd been theories of her being a spy but Gaara had vouched for her personally, even though it was mostly because she was steadfast in her belief that Naruto was unfairly banished from Konoha.

She claimed she hadn't completely forsaken Konoha but that she wouldn't give a crap about it until it had a hokage that didn't make her want to commit treason.

The fact that her loyalties lay with Naruto, and Kyuubi, and whoever was against Danzou, was fine with Gaara.

He didn't particularly like Danzou but he would not interfere with Konoha politics when they were still allies, no matter how strained their relationship was, especially after Gaara had refused to hand Hinata over and had maintained his offer of sanctuary to Naruto.

And even though Hinata didn't spill Konoha secrets, Gaara was still sure she was do her duty to Suna. At least until he found an Anbu captain as competent as her.

Naruto hadn't accepted Gaara's offer of refuge but he'd promised the redhead that if he ever needed to kill Danzou, he shouldn't hesitate to call. Or send an eagle or something.

Gaara suspected that it was only the fact that Danzou knew Konoha didn't have the necessary power to win a war with Suna kept said war from breaking out but they kept renewing their treaties anyway.

"I need you to help a friend of mine," Gaara said.

Hinata didn't show any interest. In fact, she looked like she was stifling a persistent yawn, what with the way her body was shaking.

At least, that had been Gaara's theory before she burst out laughing.

"You have a friend?" she snorted. "It's not Kankurou's puppet again, is it?"

Gaara passively managed to let his blush die down before she saw it, all the while wondering how she'd known about that.

"Pay attention," he growled.

Hinata nodded, holding back a grin. "Go ahead."

Gaara motioned with his hand and a scroll appeared in the air in front of Hinata. She took it calmly, staring at the information and the face on it before she turned hard eyes on Gaara.

"No."

Gaara smirked, knowing she'd do it. Her 'no' was probably more from shock than an actual refusal.

She probably had a million questions but pride kept her from asking them.

"This doesn't make any sense," she said softly.

Gaara motioned for the door and Hinata stared at the figure that was suddenly standing there before she turned back to Gaara.

"You let a fugitive of Konoha into Suna?" she smiled proudly. "I'm impressed."

At the door, Tsunade stood looking smug and very much like the S-class inn and former homage that she was.

Hinata stood and bowed respectfully. "Lady Tsunade."

Tsunade simply smiled. "Hello Hinata."

Gaara frowned at the respect Hinata was giving Tsunade, something she'd never bothered giving to him. He also noticed that all the booby traps had been disabled as Tsunade walked into the room, unhindered, even going so far as to sit down in the chair Gaara had been standing by. The kazekage rightly assumed that grumbling about that wasn't appropriate behaviour at the moment and stayed silent.

"I'm here about the mark on your wrist," Tsunade said.

Hinata looked from Tsunade to the red mark circling her wrist. It had appeared almost three days before with no more than a slight sting.

She hadn't died or received any threats so she'd assumed she could carry on as normal- at least until she knew what the hell was going on. She supposed she could now tell her minions that they could stop sleeping in the library to research the mark and just go home.

"So..." she smiled. "Care to tell me why you put a summoning jutsu on me?"

Tsunade smiled pleasantly. "For summoning purposes obviously."

"For what?"

"I need your new found talents."

Gaara sighed and walked toward the door, more than ready to let the women have their little chat without involving him. He had a feeling he was better off not knowing anyway.

"Hold on, Gaara," Hinata called. "If I'm to be of service to Lady Tsunade in the foreseeable future, then I won't be able to see to the Konoha delegates coming in today."

Gaara shrugged. "I'm sure you can find someone else."

"Oh no," she smiled evilly. "I can't have some lowly ninja taking care of them."

"What do you propose then?"

"You can be their escort."

"I have no reason to," Gaara replied smugly. "And I owe you no favours."

Hinata's smirk grew. "I have pictures of your room before the makeover."

Gaara paled considerably, muttering a string of impressive expletives and nodded. "Fine. Who are they?"

"Neji, Kiba and Shikamaru."

Gaara shrugged. "Fine. I'm sure Temari would take the lazy one off my hands anyway."

Neji and Kiba couldn't be too bad, he figured. He remembered Kiba being the one who gave 'puppy love' a whole new definition and Neji being a fate-obsessed emo. They were nothing he couldn't handle. Besides, he was the kazekage. He could be rude if he wished and blame it on power going to his head.

Hinata smiled winningly at Gaara, shooing him out of the room before turning to Tsunade once Gaara was gone.

"I suppose you want Konoha back."

Tsunade looked suitably impressed. "Yes."

"Quietly?"

"Of course."

"What do you need me to do?"

**(I am a hungry page break. Feed me)**

**Name**: Sakura Haruno

**Age**: Twenty-one

**Class**: S-class nin (medical nin, chakra specialist)

**Current purpose in Life: **Be the best badass Medical nin in the world, no matter what.

**Current state of purpose in life**: Achieved. Bloodily. Many times.

x-x

The forest was a calm and serene place.

Cute little woodland creatures running around, beautiful plants with colourful blooming flowers...two grown men begging for their lives.

Sakura loved the forest.

The woman, with the bright pink hair and bright green eyes smiled blankly at the two men.

They were both twice her size and dressed in ANBU uniforms but their masks lay at their feet as they knelt before her.

Sakura enjoyed their grovelling.

It gave her a sense of purpose.

There was no way she'd let them go once she caught them but the pleasure was in knowing that they didn't know that.

"Please...please..."

Sakura mentally rolled her eyes but kept her expression blank.

Her fingers twitched experimentally and one of the men moved. The other was crying like a baby because he couldn't.

Sakura had ensured that neither of them could activate any suicide jutsus knowing fully well that it was standard ANBU procedure. She had paralysed one with a poison senbon and the other...

Well, the other, she subjected to her latest jutsu.

A jutsu that gave a whole new definition to the words 'chakra control'.

Chakra strings ran from her fingers and into the veins of the squirming man. she didn't need him dead but the other one...

She flicked another senbon at him and he cried out, more from watching it pierce his skin than from feeling anything, the big baby.

Sakura had caught them both when they'd attacked her, assuming that she'd been a young, weak woman, travelling all by her lonesome.

She smirked.

Honestly, what the hell kind of ANBU attacked lone travellers, especially women? Had they no shame? No morals?

Sakura sighed at the now screaming man. She knew the feeling of chakra strings invading his skin and controlling his movements couldn't be the most comfortable thing but surely he could man up, couldn't he? When had hidden villages started letting little girls into their ANBU squads?

Honestly.

Bored, Sakura threw a kunai at the man under her control and he picked it up. After a moment, he stood and turned to his friend, kunai in hand.

With that, the other man stared in horror as his friend raised the kunai.

Sakura snorted as the man shut his eyes, apparently expecting death like a real ninja should.

To end their misery and her extended boredom, she threw another one of her own kunai at the paralysed man and ended his pathetic sobbing.

Who knew a man could produce so much snot...?

The other man stared at his dead friend and Sakura made him step back with a flick of her wrist and light movement from her fingers before she turned and leaped into the tree, running.

He followed her as she ran from tree to tree, never too far behind because of the strings she was using.

Finally, she reached her destination and sat in the tree. She threw a senbon into the man's pressure point below her and he fell to the ground, unconscious.

Sakura leaned back against the tree's trunk, occasionally breaking off chips of wood from the bark while she watched the house below her, waiting.

It looked innocent enough; small, comfortable and bright. The kind of house children would probably try to take a bite out of.

She rolled her eyes at that particular thought and continued to watch.

A woman with dark hair came out the front door and Sakura smiled, though it didn't reach her eyes.

The woman seemed sweet, singing like a Disney princess and talking to a squirrel.

Sakura half-expected her to call out for her fairy godmother and whine about not going to some party.

The woman was dressed simply in a long flowing dress- the epitome of womanly innocence.

Sakura stood on the branch when a man walked out of the house, calling to the woman, "Leah!" and then he whispered something in her ear, probably something perverted, cause Leah giggled and swatted at his arm.

"Lovely," Sakura snorted.

The man was handsome and tanned, with brown eyes and a short dark hair.

He patted the woman's bum as she walked away and she giggled again.

Sakura figured she was fast-approaching her gag level and leaped off the branch, landing gracefully next to the couple.

After a cry of surprise, the woman shot Sakura an exasperated look and muttered something about how unlady-like Sakura was before smiling at the pinkette.

"You weren't gone long," Leah said pleasantly.

Sakura nodded but didn't reply.

"Is that blood on your top?" Leah asked, moving closer to inspect Sakura who just stepped away irritably. "How did you get blood on your top?"

Sakura gave her an incredulous look. "Quite easily, I assure you."

"Were you out fighting?"

Before Sakura could answer, the man stepped forward.

Sakura couldn't help the racing of her heart as he stared at her intently. She had long ago decided against the possibility of having fallen for him. She was attracted to him, but not in love.

He was handsome, attractive, charismatic and charming-

"Did something happen?" he asked worriedly, looking her over.

"I'm fine, Tai," she said blandly. "I found someone nearer than I thought. He's over there by the tree."

Tai nodded and motioned for Sakura to enter the house.

She heard Leah giggle again and sighed before she went into the house. Sakura let Leah move forward and lead her to the bathroom, chatting her ear off the whole way. Sakura had learned to listen faithfully as Leah could be quite dramatic when she wanted.

After Sakura had left Konoha, three years before, she'd found Leah, a helpless girl with no ninja skills whatsoever in the middle of some sort of gambling ring, about to be sold.

Sakura had rescued her out of principle and Leah had asked to travel with her, as her maid, as payment for saving her life.

Sakura had refused but said she wouldn't mind a companion and Leah had readily agreed.

Of course, that had been way before Sakura had become so obsessed with solitude...and death...and blood...and the feeling of peace that all three brought her.

At the time, Sakura had been in search of a master surgeon, someone who could train her further, in ways Tsunade hadn't.

She was eternally grateful for the knowledge Tsunade had given her but she knew everything Tsunade did; about being a medic nin, avoiding paperwork and drinking sake. Tsuane had only withheld the information about the regeneration jutsu, saying that she'd let Sakura know at a time when her youth was gone and she would require it.

Sakura needed a challenge and she was extremely patient, after all she'd waited three years.

Back then, she had heard news of Tai, a medic rogue nin who'd managed to manipulate his chakra into the body of another person's chakra system. However, he was only able to do it in theory. He'd actually never managed it himself because while his chakra control was above par, it still didn't compare to Tsunade's or that of her apprentices.

So Tai had been more than happy to train Sakura when she'd approached him.

He accepted her and Leah into his home and in less than three weeks, had started sleeping with Leah.

Sakura hadn't had a thing for him then and had been under great and gruelling training that involved a lot of dead bodies. She had discovered that he really knew his stuff. The use of chakra strings was amazingly difficult, especially seeing as she first had to move them using her chakra.

Tai had then introduced Sakura to 'hunting', a term he used to describe them going out for live specimens; people who he assured Sakura, were bad people, needed to die and would be quite beneficial to science.

Sakura had agreed, after all, most were somewhat bad, being leaders of human trafficking and red light districts.

She was now being refered to as the 'Pink Angel' because she was prone to setting the slaves and captives free from gambling rings, brothels and other places she came across. It was a name she hated but could do nothing about. She certainly wasn't going to dye her hair.

And then, Tai had introduced her to his variation of using chakra control in the strings to control people, and using that in turn, to perform brain and heart transplants.

Sakura had mastered the technique in a little over a year and had been quite proud of herself when he'd told her it had taken him nearly ten years to do it himself.

Tai had eventually insisted she go hunting herself and Sakura had become quite fascinated with it. She had to admit she might even had developed some sort of blood lust.

But Tai seemed to encourage it.

Leah however, did not.

Tai and Leah had been lovers for the whole three years that the three of them had been living together but Sakura didn't mind. In trying her best to not develop into the type of fan girl she'd been when she was younger, Sakura had managed to become one of the most aloof and indifferent women Tai had ever met.

Tai was always pleasant with her, only being serious when it came to their 'business' and Sakura's training.

Sakura knew that he was a player of sorts and that when they went into villages and cities, he slept around, but she didn't tell Leah. Leah was blissfully happy and ignorant and Sakura didn't want to deal with her weeping and really needed to keep staying there, especially seeing as how Tai had told her of a new surgical technique he was developing just for her.

Also, Sakura was hoping she'd one day be immune to Tai's charm, if she was just exposed to him for a little while longer.

'A little while' had lasted way too long in her opinion but then, she'd always had a thing for prodigies. There was even that summer she'd had a fling with Sai...

Sakura shook her head as she sank further into the bath.

She had to concentrate.

The man she'd brought with her would be their 'donor' for the operation she was performing that evening. Lucky for her he'd been blood type B. That was pretty rare.

It was easy enough but Tai was having a group of rich, old men to come watch so they could fund his research and even undergo the procedure themselves if they liked what they saw.

With the use of the chakra strings, Sakura could remove traces of poison and by forcing chakra and blood into the heart of someone during surgery, the brain or heart could be transplanted and the person could have their lives extended if a younger heart was used.

Kakuzu had been pretty intelligent in that area and it seemed Tai had simply modified his jutsu.

Sakura was greatly impressed by the studies and basic intellect that had gone into the jutsu and had to admit that the only reason she stayed with Tai and Leah was because of the new jutsu he'd promised that was just for her. If not for that, she'd have left as soon as she'd mastered the chakra controlling one. After all, Tai had Leah and Leah had Tai.

Sakura had her own agenda and neither of them featured in it on the long term.

As she was drying herself off, she heard the 'guests' arrive. One of them would be her client and undergo the surgery. He had a heart problem and would be dead within the month if not for their procedure.

Sakura was not an idiot, far from it.

She knew their clients were all fickle old farts, too afraid to die and rich enough to afford to postpone it.

She also knew Tai was using her talent to rake in some seriously hard cash.

She dressed up in her surgical attire and disinfected her hands before going out to meet them.

Leah had bathed and changed as well, now dressed like a seductive and overly-welcoming hostess while Tai was in a suit, apparently explaining the procedure.

Sakura bowed to the men around Tai who were all watching her with mixtures of lust and an obvious desire to own her.

She always received offers of wealth and prosperity once these things were done.

Tai told her the room and the client were ready and she nodded, going downstairs to the basement, Tai's designated operating room.

It was large and white with two operating tables and a tray for any tools Sakura might need.

The Anbu man and the client were each on one of the tables, already unconscious.

Sakura stepped forward, ready to begin.

She knew Tai and the others were upstairs in the observation area and if she looked through the glass, she'd see them.

She lifted her scapel and froze. Her wrist burned and she swore under her breath. To anyone watching, it probably looked like she was steeling her nerves.

She saw the red mark, like a swirling tattoo on her wrist and scowled beneath her surgeon's mask.

"Damn it."

**(I am a fangirl page break. Squeal powers ACTIVATE! SQUEEEEEE...)**

"Is everything alright?" Tai asked after the procedure was completed. It had taken close to three hours.

The Anbu man was dead, his organs having been used to help lengthen the life of the old rich guy.

"Yes," she said steadily, frowning. "Why?"

"I saw you pause."

Sakura shrugged, hiding her wrist as she crossed her arms across her chest. "I thought I'd forgotten something."

"What?"

"Nothing important," she assured him. "I'll go rest now."

Tai nodded and congratulated her on her good job. The client was already awake and seemed fine. He was talking with his friends and would be ready to leave the very next day.

Sakura had already politely declined all the 'secret' offers made to leave Tai and come work for them.

She headed to her room, wanting nothing more than to sleep before she figured out who was responsible for placing a human summoning jutsu on her. And going off to kill them.

She'd only been asleep for an hour when she woke up.

Her wrist was stinging.

She was being summoned.

She smiled as she rose, excited at the prospect of having a worthy adversary.

She wondered if they'd be more than one.

It wouldn't matter anyway.

Usually, even if they were more, enemies usually came over with a leader.

Which meant if she controlled the leader, she'd control the rest of them.

She'd been training to control more than one body but found she wasn't yet up to it. One victim would have to be her limit for now.

She heard the grunting and moaning she'd become accustomed to hearing as she passed Leah's room and rolled her eyes.

She wasn't one to eavesdrop, especially when it was pretty obvious there was little or no talking actually being done.

And she almost kept walking.

Really.

But-

"...Sakura?"

She froze.

They were talking about her.

She backed up, leaning against the wall.

"We won't wake her up," Leah said, out of breath. "And stop talking about her in bed."

"Jealous?"

Sakura could almost see Tai's smirk.

"Please," Leah said spitefully. "It's not like you like you care for her."

Tai chuckled after another grunt. "Yes well, she's useful for business. We need to keep her happy."

Leah huffed. "Fine. Then maybe you could come onto her or something. It's not like you have anything more to give her."

"Tch," Tai growled. "I doubt she'd go for anything romantic. She's too-"

"Asexual?"

"Maybe. We'll just have to find a way to keep her here longer. I have a big client wanting her services."

Leah snickered. "Sounds kinky."

"Mm."

"But," Leah let out a long moan and was silent for a moment before she continued. "Won't...won't she stay anyway? You promised her that new jutsu-"

Tai laughed, sounding out of breath. "I did. But it doesn't exist."

"Wha-"

Sakura froze, the rest of their conversation going over her head.

There was no new jutsu?

Fuck.

She felt her blood boil.

She knew Tai was using her skills but that hadn't bothered her because she needed the practise. And she needed him to teach her anything else he knew.

But apparently, he knew nothing else. And had lied to keep her.

She kicked the door open, uncaring as to their state of undress. Or their activity.

Sharp cries of pain brought her out of her pissed-off haze and she stared at the two in the bed, staring back at her in surprise, their expressions ones of discomfort.

Sakura blinked, realising she'd unknowingly released her chakra strings into their bodies.

She sat down at the desk calmly, wondering what to do about them.

"Sa-Sakura," Leah said, her voice small and soft. "What are you doing awake so soon?"

Sakura gave her a dry look, shrugging. She crossed her legs and continued to contemplate them.

From the looks of things, neither of them knew whether or not she'd heard their conversation or had just gone mad and snapped.

Sakura smiled slowly and Leah and Tai moved away from each other to face her.

Tai's eyes were wide as he watched.

"You...you're cntrolling us both?"

No doubt his mind was already counting the money he saw himself earning from making her do two operating procedures at once.

Sakura didn't answer him.

She was kinda surprised, too.

She was controlling two people simultaneously, something she'd never been able to do. It was the reason why she mostly only used her technique for speedy assassinations.

However, what was even more suprising was that she could control them without moving. She didn't need to point or motion with her hands at all.

Well.

This was new.

"This isn't necessary, Sakura," Tai started. "I think we should-"

"Quiet."

He shut up.

Sakura sighed and stood, sending ripples of chakra along her strings.

Tai and Leah both passed out and she cut off their respiration abruptly. She immediately jump-started their hearts and left them there, unconscious.

There would be no point in killing them.

She packed her things and left.

Standing in the large tree in front of the house, she bowed respectfully at it, saying her silent goodbye.

Feeling a prescence behind her, she stilled.

"Sakura."

Sakura's eyes widened as she stared into the eyes of her former sensei.

The woman in front of her look exactly like Tsunade but something was off.

She smiled however and nodded at Sakura. "I smell blood on you."

Sakura smiled back sharply. "Au dé ninja."

Tsunade chuckled and motioned for Sakura to follow her. "There's things we must discuss."

Sakura felt the pull on her wrist and frowned. "You're responsible for this," she pointed at her wrist.

Tsinade nodded, barely glancing down at Sakura's wrist.

Sakura's interest was piqued and she was safe in the knowledge that she could easily defend herself. She wasn't arrogant enough to assume she could defeat Tsunade. But she could definitely beat the woman in front of her.

"Alright," Sakura said. "Talk. And drop the genjutsu."

The woman smiled proudly at Sakura and let the heavy genjutsu wash off her, her own form coming to light.

Sakura had certainly grown into a dangerous kunoichi, Shizune noted with a pleased smile.

Tsunade was right to choose her.

**(I am a ninja page break. Man, I'm awesome)**

Tsunade sneezed and looked down at the notes in front of her again before scolwing up at Itachi. Hinata was silent beside her.

Itachi had appeared when their meeting was almost done, with some urgent new information.

"This project was called Door To December?"

Itachi nodded. "They planned to use a subject in random tests. Tests where the subject was unconscious and would black out every time, differing between days and weeks. In an effort to do what they called 'opening the door'."

"Constantly?"

"No, he was free to do as he wished," Itachi said. "That was why I never noticed it before. He was never missing for long and would apparently never remember the tests, not even wondering why days were missing from his memory."

"They tampered with his memory?"

"Yes. Made him believe he was doing mundane things. Training, shopping, resting..."

"This project," Tsunade sighed, looking at the file on her desk. "Did they succeed?"

Itachi hesitated and then nodded. "In a manner of speaking."

"What happened?"

"I don't know. The lab was destroyed and everyone was dead."

"Killed?"

"Thoroughly."

Tsunade grimaced. "Who was their test subject?"

Itachi's expression remained blank, successfully hiding the fury behind it. "Sasuke."

ss-ss-ssss-ssss-ss-

**A/N: For those who don't know 'the wiggle', watch LMFAO's 'I'm sexy and I know it' video...**

**That dance...is awesome. Almost makes you wish you were a dude...**

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**THANKS FOR ALL THE REVIEWS :D Must be the most reviews I've received for one chapter so *gushes with joy and splodes...***

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